the real Sweeney Todd

Hey Jerusha,

So remember how we were talking about Sweeny Todd yesterday. Well I went on netflicks to watch the movie again, and get this! Another Sweeney Todd thats nothing like the Todd we know exists. Check it out…..

FOLLOW JERUSHA

Let me introduce you to the real Demon Barber,

In this original version of the movie there isn’t any sing a long songs at all, but it’s full of white noise that sounds like water boiling. lol ..you get a warm feeling as well as a chill up your spine from it because Todd is a real creep in this movie.

First off. This is Todd

“Why Hello Sir” – Todd

you might be able to tell, but he’s bad news and he’s a stalker.

He’s got his eyes on Johanna, who in this movie isn’t his daughter.

This is Johanna,

Problem is, Johanna has a boyfriend. Anthony ..

Thats Anthony,

“I wuv you!” – Anthony

But problem is Johanna is a rich girl and Anthony is a bit broke. And being broke is something that might keep Johanna & Anthony from getting married because her father doesn’t play that shit. So Anthony goes away to get some money and while he’s gone, Todd starts plotting on Johanna. I mean their not married so I guess it isn’t all that bad, but Todd is really a creep in this movie so he’s pretty much awkward with everything he does.

“I’m sorry did you say something?” – TODD

“No, Todd; I keeping quite cuz you repulse me.” – Johanna

So time goes on, and Todd knows that Johanna can’t marry Anthony right now because he’s a broke ass, so Todd starts getting his money up by killing more rich people and doing business with Johnna’s father. Thing is Todd was real ungrateful to the people that helped him, mainly Mrs. Lovett; who I suspect is a gypsy in this movie.

“Heres your half of the pay, which I already took all of, Enjoy” – Todd

“But theres no money in here. Just bills” – Mrs. Lovett 😦


And I like Mrs. Lovett too. (^_^) In this movie she doesn’t like Sweeney like that, she just does business with him. But he swindles her out of money and that later bites him back in the ass.

So shit happens and Anthony comes back with mad money.

“Man we came up big. Now I got some money to marry Johnna. I might get ass tonight” – Anthony


Toby his apprentice tells him that Anthony just got back in town, and then Todd went back into creep mode and decided he was going to give Anthony a close cut.

“Oh shit, He really is back in Town” -Todd

“Hey there! Why don’t you come and get a cut. I’ll give you one you wont forget” – Todd

“Sure, I’m bout to see my girl. She’ll like it if I’m clean” – Anthony

Unfortunately Anthony doesn’t know that Todd knows who he is, and he decides to get the cut before he goes to visit his boo. But of course.. nothing good is about to happen.

“Hey Toby, I got a penny for you. Go Next Door and eat some pie” – Todd

“But Sir, I’m not hungr…” – Toby

“I said go eat some damn pie!!!! ” – Todd

But lucky enough Mrs. Lovett who is already pissed that Todd is cheating her out of her pay; over hears Anthony and Todd talking. She decides to snoop around to see if Todd is stealing from her, but in snooping she discovers Todd’s plot to kill Anthony.

“That bastard!” – Mrs. Lovett

So then Todd sends Toby next door to Lovett’s for some Pies, and then goes a head to pull the switch to the trap door under the barbers chair while Anthony wasn’t looking.

“Alright, back to business” – Todd

“Oh shit, I didn’t know you had those new automated chairs.” – Anthony

Mrs. Lovett, downstairs; sees Anothony and feels sorry for him. So she hides him and tell’s Todd that he probably woke up and snuck out the alley way connected to the basement.

“Poor thing, don’t worry. You’ll have your face back in your girls cooch in no time” – Mrs. Lovett

So more shit happens and Mrs. Lovett helps Anthony escape. Now Anthony’s pissed! He let’s all his friends know that Todd is a dick, and devises a plan to get Todd caught up. Little did they know that Todd had already made up his own little plan. You know what it is?

Insurance Fraud.

“THIS IS SURE TO WORK, THEY  HAVEN’T THE TECHNOLOGY TO PROVE I DID IT YET” – TODD

Everything was going so well until Johanna’s in the way ass decided she needed a more important role in the movie other of being the victim. She devises her own ingenious plan with Todd’s 10 yr old apprentice Toby, and she goes to Todd’s shop in a horrible disguise as a boy. Which in the grand scheme of things, stills makes this broad a damn victim.

IN THE WAY!!!!!

“Ma’am, with all due respect; I think your plan is bullocks.” – Toby

“Hi, I umm, I’m here to work” – Johanna

“I already have an apprentice, Go Away” – Todd

“But I have Money” – Johanna

“Why come on in then you idiot” – Todd

Her cover was that she wanted to be Todd’s Apprentice, and Todd plays along and tells her to come in, but her dumb ass kept dropping money everywhere and Todd got back into creep mode and demanded she give him her money. She struggled and mysteriously got knocked out without even being hit. And I think Todd was kind of confused too but he couldn’t care cuz he was about to commit insurance fraud. So he had no time to mess around with this idiot.

“I said give me that money !!!” – Todd

“Why does this boy have breasts? No Matter, I have insurance fraud to follow through with.” – Todd

So he locked her in the closet, grabbed the money he collected, and went across the street to feel good about himself.

“They’ll think it was a suicide.” – Todd

“I’ll tell them I went to the store and all of a sudden I see my shop on fire” – Todd


So let’s wrap this up. Johnna’s best friend found out through Toby that she was at Todd’s shop and Anthony and his goon’s came to rescue her. Anthony made it to the shop in time and for some reason Todd felt the need to come back to the shop and finish the job. Him and Anthony duke it out .. but then in the end Todd got slapped and died in the shop as it burned down .. Happy ending I guess.

 

“I just found out Johnna went to Todd’s Shop, you have to save her” – Johanna’s Friend

“Dammit, I told her not to get in the way” – Anthony

“YOU!” – Anthony

“ME !” – Todd

“Why are you so Strong?” – Anthony

“No matter, SUPER SLAP!!” – Anthony

“I’m down!” – Todd


Despite the parts that seemed a bit ridiculous, this movie is actually pretty damn entertaining.

now to the part of this post that I couldn’t wait to get to … The Music .. (^_^) ..

WE HAVE TO WARM UP FIRST

Vodpod videos no longer available.

NOW LET’s BEGIN (^_^)

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Opps .. I’ve got to go. It’s almost time to drink with the buddies. I hope you enjoyed that.

Talk to ya later .. (^_^)


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